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怎样写一篇作文?(12)

[日期:2017-05-17] 来源:三亚二中  作者:2017-05-17 19:03 [字体: ]

  各位好,这是写作专栏系列第十二期,关于栏目标介绍可见专栏介绍。

  我在上一篇文章英语中的“文化背景知识”有必要完全掌握吗?里面提到了英语文化知识,顺着这个话题讲,有些时候我们可能会遇到一些在传统词典上找不到的,与当前文化潮流相关的单词和短语。遇到这种情形怎么办呢?一个方法是查问 Urban Dictionary.

  Urban Dictionary(城市词典)是一个说明英语俚语词汇的在线词典,由Aaron Peckham于1999年创建。截至2010年4月,这个网站拥有486万个词汇的定义。词汇数目天天都在不断增加。这些词汇定义由志愿者通过注册该网站后编辑提交,用户能够对这些定义做出评定。举个例子,经济学人上有这样一句话:

  The near-permanent euro crisis has proved a classic exercise in shambolic decision-making, consisting mostly of agreeing to kick the can down the road.

  其中 kick the can down the road 这一用法可以在城市词典上找到:

  

  还有最近因为美联航事件而发生的一个新词:re-accommodate

  

  假如你平时遇到一些在惯例词典上找不到的新词和俚语,可以尝尝看在 Urban Dictionary 搜一搜,可能会有成果。不外需要注意的一点是,网站上词条的定义是由志愿者给出的,有时候会不够准确,要学会本人甄别。 Urban Dictionary的地址是:http://www.urbandictionary.com

  这是今天要分析的作文题目:

  Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

  这是原始作文版本:

  习作/Scottie

  Convenience food is all the rage as it is adapted to the rapid pace of modern lifestyle. And the traditional diets are finally a thing of the past. In my view, although some people tend to eat packaged food instead of traditional meal, the dietetic custom can not be superseded.

  Taking it into account that convenience food such as instant noodle, frozen food and other tertiary processed food is well-prepared for ease of consumption, people who are either too busy to cook a meal or lacking culinary skills opt for them to allay their hunger. However, consuming packaged food regularly will put our health at potential risks. Convenience food generally does not contain fresh ingredients providing necessary nutrition for teenagers who are at a time of physics growth. Furthermore, because of too many salt, sugar, fat and food additives added during preparation, fast food is trigger for the increasing level of obesity and diabetes. In addition, increasingly prevalent processed food contributes to the rising usage of plastics packages, which lead to too much solid waste and rub-bish in landfills.

  Traditional methods of food preparation sound bothering and time-consuming, but they are actually irreplaceable to our daily life. People who cook at home have access to fresh vegetables and meet consisting of varied vitamin and protein, and it is much more nourishing than eating junk food. What's more, when a whole family sitting together around the dining table eat a dinner prepared with affec-tion, it is not only plates of food but an emotional bond and a piece of warming memory. And food tradition, to some extent, represents a specific culture and if we break with the traditional diet and ad-vocate convenience food excessively, the history of human revolution will suffer a heavy loss.

  In brief, we’d better cook and eat tradition dish normally, and regard convenience food as an alterna-tive for the sake of our health and environment. Traditional methods of food preparation will never be superseded by modern food industry.

  这是点评版本:

  Convenience food is all the rage as it is adapted to the rapid pace of the modern lifestyle. And the() traditional diets are finally a thing of the past. (与客观事实不符)In my view, although some people tend to eat packaged food instead of traditional meals, the dietetic custom can not(traditional food will not) be superseded.

  Taking it into account that convenience food such as instant noodles, frozen food and other tertiary processed food is well-prepared for ease of consumption, people who are either too busy to cook a meal or lacking culinary skills opt for them to allay their hunger. However, consuming packaged food regularly will put our health at potential risks. Convenience food generally does not contain fresh ingredients providing necessary nutrition for teenagers who are at a time of physics growth.(physical development) Furthermore, because of too many(too much)salt, sugar, fat and too many food additives added during preparation, fast food is atrigger for the increasing level of obesity and diabetes. In addition, increasingly prevalent processed food contributes tothe rising usage of plastics packages,(more plastic packaging)which leadsto too much solid waste and rubbish(/)in landfills.

  Traditional methods of food preparation sound bothering and time-consuming, but they are actually irreplaceable toour daily life. People who cook at home have access to fresh vegetables and meet(meat)consisting of varied vitamins and proteins, and it is much more nourishing than eating()junk food. What's more(What is more), when a whole family sitting together around the dining table eat a dinner prepared with affection, (a carefully prepared dinner)it is not only plates of food but(traditional food serves as) an emotional bond and a piece of warming memory. And food tradition, to some extent, represents a specific culture and if we break with the traditional diet and advocate convenience food excessively, the history of human revolution(traditional cultures) will suffer a heavy loss.

  In brief, we’d(we had)better cook and eat tradition dishesnormally, and regard convenience food as an alternative for the sake of our health and the environment. Traditional methods of food preparation will never be superseded by modern food industry. (its modern counterpart)

  思路剖析:

  Convenience food will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional food and traditional methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

  这道标题比较轻易,一个常见写法是分析方便食品和传统食品的优毛病,得出相应结论。便利食品的主要优点是准备时间短,可以知足人们快节奏生活的要求。另外一个优点是它可以让那些不会做饭的人也能自己独立准备食品。它的缺点是不健康,长期食用会有健康危险,此外,方便食品的味道也较为单一,不够传统食品那么多样化。

  传统食品的优点是健康,同时它还与许多传统节日相接洽,是传统节日不可或缺的一部分(好比端午节的粽子,感恩节的火鸡等)。同时,传统食品也与家庭关联严密联系。家庭成员一起准备食材和吃饭的过程有助于增强彼此的沟通和互动,营造良好的家庭氛围。传统食物的缺陷准备时间比较长。

  下面是我写的一个版本:

  习作/魏剑峰

  The growing popularity of convenience food in recent years has led some to argue that such food will take the place of traditional food and its preparation. However, I believe traditional food will survive and thrive, because it plays an indispensable part in our lives.

  It is true that convenience food is useful for saving time in today’s fast-paced world. Traditional cooking is often time-consuming; by contrast, making a meal of packaged food such as instant noodles and canned vegetables is much faster. This enables busy office workers to fill their bellies with relative ease. In addition, convenience food is a natural choice for those who live alone and lack the necessary culinary skills to prepare a meal for themselves.

  However, the popularity of convenience food does not mean it will eventually replace traditional cooking. Research shows that most processed food provides little or no nutritional value and is high in sugar and fat. Such qualities make it hazardous to our health, and because of this, many are calling for a return to healthier homemade meals. Traditional food is also associated with cultural events. For example, people in North America eat roasted turkey on Thanksgiving Day to celebrate the festival, a practice that has roots in the colonial history of the United States. Without traditional food and its preparation, important festivals such as Thanksgiving Day would be incomplete.

  In summary, people will continue to prefer traditional food and preparation methods for its health benefits and cultural significance, and such food is unlikely to be replaced by its modern counterpart.

  预告:

  本专栏下期要分析的作文题目是:

  Advertising aimed at children should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

  感兴趣的同窗可以先思考如何写,然后对比下期的思路分析。提议有空的同学自己动笔写一篇。

  本作文专栏长期接收读者投稿,感兴趣的同学可以将习作发到我的邮箱 jianfengscut@163.com,部分习作有机遇得到点评。

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